How do you recover from an affair?

Affairs can be traumatic for relationships

An affair can cause severe devastation to your relationship and your sense of self. Discovering that your partner has been unfaithful can cause shakes and tremors in your family, daily life and work. You may move between feelings of fear and desperation to shame, guilt, rage and severe sadness.

It can make you feel confused as your relationship goes up and down

You can feel intensely connected to your partner, but intensively repulsed and angry and push them away. Communication may open up but break down as you ask the same questions over and over again.


You may want to rush and make decisions but you can’t make sense of the options. You could feel hopeless, confused and vulnerable.


Whether you want to end our relationship or recover together, counselling can help you get through the initial trauma so you can make sense of what has happened and why before deciding to move forward.


Recovering from the affair counselling  by Heidi Smith Relationship Psychologist are based on the only program that’s been tested–and proven–to relieve destructive emotions in the wake of infidelity, “Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You Cope, Heal, and Move On — Together or Apart this compassionate book offers support and expert advice from a team of award-winning couple therapists.


Counselling can guide you through the initial trauma of dealing with an affair, and take you and your partner you step by step through the process of understanding what happened and deciding what to do next.


The first step to recovering from an affair is to talk about the affair and make sense of what has happened.  This is important because if you have no opportunity to get information to try to “make sense” of something that has turned your life upside down, you have no way of getting beyond it. If you can’t trust your spouse to be honest about the past, how can you trust they’ll be honest in the future.



Counselling can help you to:

  • Deal with the shock to keep you or your family going
  • Talk with your partner without making things worse, talk about the right things
  • Set clearly boundaries to help rebuild trust
  • Understand what went wrong, why it happened and how you can prevent it
  • Rebuild your relationship



It you would like to find out how we can help call our office 08 6555 7786

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Heidi Smith is the principal psychologist at Aresolution. Heidi has over 12 years experience in counselling. Heidi is passionate about working with couples, families and individuals with post-traumatic stress disorder or obsessive-compulsive disorder. In couple counselling Heidi has a particular interest in helping couples manage conflict and recover from affairs.